I arrived at the hospital at 9.45pm and it’s 2.30am when I go to my bedroom. The splint around my knee is barely able to close.

They put me on my bed. The nurse looks at me strangely. “I have to undress you” she says. I smile. She looks at my short and tries to get it off the normal way.

“I think you’re kidding” I reply. You’re going to use a pair of scissors.

It’s 3.30am, I finally manage to sleep.